zftw:

genderthief:

i gave my dog a tortilla chip ten minutes ago and she won’t fucking eat it she’s just staring at me with it in her mouth 

she’s waiting for the salsa

rosadrives:

when ur wife invites a bee over for dinner and he sits in ur spot

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(via foxnewsofficial)

toastdurr:

vagisodium:

i bet my tongue is stronger than yours wanna find out

hELL YES

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(Source: trashboat, via feelinglikeflying)

digg:

Probably the greatest machine man has ever created

I don’t know why but with you I’d dance in a storm in my best dress, fearless…
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